Modern life is full of difficulties on every corner. However, only a few are as toxic as a bad marriage. It causes both bad physical and mental health, including stress and anxiety, which are pretty much silent killers. Unfortunately, due to numerous factors, many folks ignore divorce as an option and stay locked inside such marital relationships.
Reasons for such behavior include both personal fears as well as societal beliefs that make divorce such a taboo subject for some. Of course, none of these should be an excuse for living a life like that. At first, it might be hard to take a step in that direction, but accepting the reality is a must for anyone not happy with the marital aspect of their life.
Contrary to many traditional beliefs, there are good sides to divorce. In fact, they outnumber any make-belief excuses why you shouldn’t stray away from a bad marriage. From avoiding physical or mental abuse to beginning a new chapter in your life, ending your unhappy, legally binding relationship should always be an option.
What Causes Bad Marriage?
There are numerous reasons why your marriage is turning sour. We can come up with more than a few of them off the bat. The obvious one would be a lack of trust between you and your partner. You can suspect that they are lying to you about this or that or that they are even cheating on you. Either way, it’s a major red flag.
On the other hand, one of you doesn’t listen or value the other’s opinions. They think how they are more intelligent, so they overlook what the other person has to say. Furthermore, bad marriages also come about due to constant blaming between partners. You can’t accept each other’s faults, so you resolve to call one another out.
Other reasons include not spending enough time together, lack of respect, and even no room for forgiveness. Similarly, there are always problems like constant comparisons with other couples, trying to change each other’s way of thinking, and fostering bad and unhealthy habits.
Divorce Gives You Second Chances in Life
In essence, there are three interesting perspectives of how divorces grant us second chances.
The first one allows us to learn something new about ourselves. Although divorce is a loss of a previous life, it allows us to learn what and who we want to be once again. It’s like you’re a teenager once again, going through partners and experimenting with your body, views, and overall lifestyle.
On the flip side, divorce shows us that we’re survivors. And if you think about it, survivors can do anything. You might not have been in an abusive relationship (physical or mental), but you did go through a negative experience. As such, you’re, by definition, stronger and ready to take on new challenges with more perspective.
Thirdly, new chances aren’t common in life. We should, therefore, grab them with both hands and never let go. Luck came your way, and you’d be a fool not to accept the fruits that came along with it.
People Step Away From Abuse
The unfortunate reality behind many unhappy marriages is that they come about due to domestic abuse. Either physical or mental, both are horrendous experiences for abused partners and children if they exist. This is why so many people seek divorce. As such, no stigma or taboo can prevent them from doing it, and we fully agree.
Nothing can substitute being abused: no kind of financial benefits, number of children, or any other argument why some stay inside such marriages. It’s not a rough patch — it’s torment. Most statistics suggest women are more often on the receiving end of violence, but it still works both ways. Either way, signing your marriage dead is certainly the right call.
Kids Receive More Attention
In case you’re worried about how divorce will affect your kids, don’t be. Sure, it’s always tough when your parents are getting a divorce, but it’s not the end of the world. In fact, the whole process is focused on them more than it is on the married couple. The two of you might have valid reasons, but when kids are involved, they simply come first. Well, at least, that’s how the social security administration and the judge will see it.
The court will decide how the divorced spouses switch between taking care of their children. In some cases, they might completely remove the right of one parent to look after kids. This can happen due to domestic violence history, inability to parent, or an inability to provide financial aid. In that last case, they will still have a legal obligation to pay child support of certain value. All this revolves around children getting their deserved attention.
You Give Yourself Room to Grow
Divorce gives also allows people to take their time and to review their life, chapter by chapter. In many ways, you can look at ending your relationship as taking a look into the mirror of your life and seeing all the right and wrong moves. And if you do, you give yourself a better chance at making more rights the next time you engage in a romantic relationship.
But don’t worry if this might sound selfish. It’s not. In fact, it’s better to do so than to stay locked up inside a toxic relationship. It doesn’t have to be violent or abusive — it can just be dull and wrong for you as a person. Therefore, divorce doesn’t have anything to do with being selfish. It, what’s more, has to do with being true to yourself and prepared to grow.
You Lose a Partner, but You Gain Happiness
Since we’ve briefly mentioned selfishness, let’s expand on it a bit, shall we? Namely, a divorce is a more honest way to live life than to be in a failing relationship. As such, it would be, in turn, selfish to stay with someone you don’t love or care for anymore. You can, therefore, say that divorces lead to actual happiness for both partners.
On the one hand, you lose a partner; on the other, you gain something more important. That is, you reach actual happiness, which is yet another benefit from divorce. You get to start over again, away from all the toxicity or the complete lack of any feelings. Your children get a healthier environment than they would inside a cold home with their parents acting as two warring sides. And to top it off, you move away with an unmeasurable life experience.